Been There, Done That on Mother’s Day

By Marci Shatzman

Mother’s Day’s rough on people our age whose mom isn’t here anymore.

Fond memories don’t seem to help this time of year. The ads for cards, flowers, presents and Mother’s Day meals are just reminders of the mother’s love we no longer have.

Even if we think we’ve come to terms with the loss, we can’t wait until the Mother’s Day hype is over.   

I thought my sister and I were the only ones who dreaded Mother’s Day since our Mom passed away in 2016. But I was wrong. We’re in good company. Everyone I asked felt the same way, even if they’re a mother themselves.

I checked in with my cousin Mark in Los Angeles, whose mom I admired as a close aunt. I knew he still misses her, too. We keep her memory alive in Boca with her ring I wear on special occasions.
My mother’s smiling face looks out at me from a photo in front of my computer, so I see her every day. It took me a while to do that, and I highly recommend it. But I completely understand why it’s too soon for people who haven’t recovered from losing their mother. Life isn’t a movie, and it takes time to come to terms with it. Some never do.

And it’s not because that means we’re the next generation in line to leave. Nobody I talked to even thought about that.

Mother’s Day isn’t about us growing older. If you watch any award show, you’ll see honorees thank their mother or her memory. They always say, and I agree, “I wish my mother was here to see this.”