Friendships Are For Keeping
By Dr. Synesio Lyra, Jr.
One of the greatest gifts humans can enjoy, whether we realize that or not, is some of the people surrounding us. More specifically, the friends that find their way into our hearts, there remaining for a long time, some even till death. We all have such people in our lives. But are we that to others as well?
I never forget a book I read years ago, authored by a multi-millionaire, where he stated that his most valuable assets were not monetary in nature; they were, instead, the many friendships he had developed through the years. That was the Bank to which he returned continuously, not to deplete but, rather, to cultivate each of those assets.
Psychologist Eugene Kennedy affirms that “true friendship is the only thing that can really bear people up in a world in which it is impossible to predict what will go wrong next.” In spite of all human imperfections, having friends and being a friend relates to one of the greatest privileges and blessings available to all human creatures.
In my travels to different parts of the world, I have found that the countries I have enjoyed the most are not necessarily those with majestic scenery, the most efficient public transportation system, or with unforgettable historical monuments. Rather, it is those nations where new, meaningful friendships were established and continue to be maintained.
What we need to recognize continuously is that friendships, like any other human enterprise, require time and cultivation. They do not merely happen, all of a sudden. They usually are the result of hard work which may last years before reaching the desired level. It’s like a tender plant which requires our careful attention on a continuing basis. It is a developmental process requiring several stages through which it must travel. It also demands understanding concerning human nature, in the sense that people are different and will act and react differently in varied situations. Most importantly, perhaps, is that we become a friend to someone else not for what we can get out of that friendship but, rather, for what we can be and do for another. It’s only selfless friendships which shall endure!
Many years ago, before taking another trip to the Czech Republic, I wrote to someone in Prague who had become one of my best friends anywhere in the world. I inquired what he might desire for me to take along from the U.S.A. as a gift for him. In his reply, he indicated that he desired no gift other than my visit; “you are the best gift,” he wrote to me.
Indeed, just as many persons have become true gifts to us, through their friendship, may we also be the best possible gift to many, as we befriend them by our own initiative, or simply respond to their own desire to have us as a friend to them.
