Published On: Thu, Apr 28th, 2016

Avoid Being Unnecessarily Contrary!

By Dr. Synesio Lyra, Jr.

Have you ever experienced interactions with persons who love to contradict what you say? Especially in front of others that’s most annoying! No matter what the subject of your conversation may be, it appears they have to say No to your remarks, even if just to re-state exactly the same thing in their own words!

I have not only encountered that with a few people, but have also observed many more who have that ugly habit of interrupting, and making a big deal of whatever they think was a misstatement. One time I remember having heard that so much between two persons with whom I was talking, that I almost shut them up, or left the room where the conversation was occurring.

It’s most unpleasant to hear individuals acting in that fashion. They seem to hold on to superficial details which they utilize to contradict a fellow communicator. Not only their opinions alone have any significance, according to them, but even the words used by another have to be terms they prefer, instead of the words being employed.

Obviously, it is proper for anyone to aim at accuracy in what is verbally conveyed during an interaction in which you participate. But there is no need to insist that something described was in the afternoon rather than evening, that it occurred when it was raining or sunny, that it caused much laughing, or none at all!

What matters most is the legitimacy of the total story, not irrelevant details. Furthermore, those listening in to the narration need not have to put up with constant corrections of matters of no consequence to what is being described!

In such situations, very quickly personal interest is totally lost in what is being said amidst so many interruptions just to contradict the communicator. I could care less if it was on a Tuesday, at a restaurant or Thursday at a coffee shop, at a casual encounter in a store, or a planned gathering at a different location. There’s no need to overemphasize these unnecessary details to the point of missing any benefit from the story as a whole.

People who do such things would insist on precision, accuracy, truth. Yet, most of what they would view as such do not alter the central elements of the narrative. If you have an urge to interrupt, be sure that it is for clarification of issues that are indispensable to what is being described, not valueless details which neither add nor subtract from the conversation!  

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