12 Signs You’re a True Floridian
While there is an abundance of Florida stereotypes that are kind of questionable, there are some that do ring true. Here are some that might not describe you, but you are guaranteed to have a friend (or five) who do fall under it.
1. You have more flip flops/Top-Siders/Vans/other ‘beach’ shoes than anything else.
It’s always a problem for you when you need any remotely fancy shoes. When the Rainbows, Sperry’s, or Vans don’t cut it, we’re all at a loss. Closed-toed shoes and socks are just asking too much of us.
2. You’ve been to the Keys at least once in your lifetime.
Any reference to “down south” can only mean Key West. You even have your Key of preference.
3. You’re not entirely sure how to turn on the heat in your car.
I mean, you’ve never really had to use it. You also discovered the Floridian life hack: use the defroster to get the condensation from the humidity off your windshield.
4. You’ve hoped for a hurricane at some point.
Whether it be to get off work or school, you’ve silently prayed that a nice category two would miraculously flood your route. No need to feel embarrassed. We’ve all had hurricane parties.
5. Any temperature below 70 degrees warrants an “I’m too cold.”
When the temperature dips to anything just slightly cooler, you can’t wait to finally use your fireplace.
6. You own more bathing suits than winter apparel.
There’s no shame in having a drawer full of bathing suits.
7. You can bait your own hook.
You heard me.
8. You’ve got parking in the shade down to an art.
You know how vengeful your leather car seats can get in August. For you, parking has nothing to do with distance and everything to do with how cool you can keep your car.
9. You can spot a snowbird a mile away.
It may or may not have something to do with their driving etiquette.
10. You know that having a friend with a boat is better than actually having one.
Why waste precious time and money on boat maintenance when you can just tag along for the ride?
11. Christmas for you is a little atypical.
You’ve spent your holidays with the air conditioning cranked up and with an occasional beach day. The only white Christmas you’ve had was evening out those tan lines.
12. You always have an umbrella in your car.
The title of Sunshne State, especially during the summer, can be a downright lie. You don’t even blink anymore when you’re driving down Sample and a sudden downpour hits your windshield.